While talking to my oldest daughter many years ago (she’s 24 now!), we discussed the need for decluttering her bedroom.
Over the years, she had collected quite an array of toys, books, decorative objects, and miscellaneous odds and ends. She’s like me and tends to bond emotionally to anything that enters her room, so getting her to willingly clear out the excess “stuff” could be quite an ordeal.
I’ve learned over the years that the more clutter and excess stuff I carry with me, the more disorganized and scattered my life feels. My daughter and I looked around her room and I asked her, “When you look at the piles of papers and toys in your room, do you feel overwhelmed by it all — not even sure where to start when you need to clean your room?”
She agreed that was just how she felt. So many of the items I saw in her room were things she never used or played with anymore. But I could also see that she had special items that really held meaning to her and that she used regularly.
I suddenly had an idea.
I picked up her all-time favorite toys (the ones that were “real” in the Velveteen Rabbit sense of the word), and held them up to her and said, “Big Bird and Fluffy are your special toys, right? They’re your comforting friends, your buddies you sleep with each night. They’ve seen you through surgeries and scary times. You’ll probably want to keep them forever.”
She smiled and nodded as she realized I knew how much her favorite stuffed animals meant to her. Then I grabbed two pink bunnies from under her bed that she never played with anymore. They were nothing special to her, just a couple of plain old pink bunnies.
“Now look carefully at these pink bunnies,” I said. “Do you want to lug them around with you for the rest of your life? They’re nice bunnies. They’re even cute bunnies. But are they special bunnies?”
She laughed at the idea of lugging those pink bunnies around with her forever, and agreed they weren’t anything she played with or thought about.
As we looked around, she realized her room was full of other “Pink Bunnies” — those items that just took up space, cluttering up her closet, dresser and floor. I suggested she make two piles of things in her room. The “Pink Bunny” pile and the “Big Bird and Fluffy” pile.
If something wasn’t a favorite item that was used regularly, it belonged in the “Pink Bunny” pile. Items that brought her joy, had particular meaning, and were used frequently would be put in the “Big Bird and Fluffy” pile.
Suddenly it became not only easy to sort her toys, but also lots of fun! I’d hold up a toy and ask, “What’s this one?”
She’d laugh and say, “It’s a Pink Bunny!” And then happily toss it into the pile of toys destined for the yard sale box in the garage. As we sorted, the Pink Bunnies seemed to outnumber the special toys by about three to one.
After she sorted through her toys, she had a nice manageable pile of only her very favorite toys. Not only did it reduce the clutter in her room, but it also brought her a great sense of accomplishment. She finally was able to sort through everything and part with the things she didn’t use anymore.
I successfully used the same technique recently with my son … only we called the two categories “dirt” and “gold” as we went on a “mining expedition” through his room.
So, how many Pink Bunnies do you have in your house and life? Maybe it’s time to sort through any accumulated clutter and find out.
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Plenty of my friends and family have advised to ‘clear the clutter when the little ones are in bed’. I’ve always felt this to be a little disrespectful and insensitive. I really like your idea and feel that it helps the child to learn a valuable lesson about possessions. I will definitely be trying this outl Thanks.